falling short

Falling short and I don't mean height-wise...just disappointing myself after the lessons learned. Motivation is so fickle and unless I have those friends who keep my accountable I fall by the wayside again and again...

Why I am Motivated...

I gave a talk at a Healthy Habits meeting at our church tonight and found myself so full of things to say - some motivating as to why I am motivated to run or strive to be healthy or just to reflect on my own journey since I began running and have run 3 marathons, 5-6 mini-marathons, 2 10-milers, 2 10k's and can't count the 5k's.

However, as much fun as it was to recall my own journey and the success and failure I felt at times, injuries I endured, and mental toughness I developed, what I feel was not said...was the real reason that I am motivated now. God has brought me so far in the past 4 years here in Jasper after leaving Louisville. He's taught me again and again what it means to live a life for Him and to give up the "me" story. I fall often and with injury (literally and figuratively) but the lesson comes up again and again. This life is not about me. It's not about my running times or that I even ran. It's about me being obedient to what He calls me to do and to use the gifts that He has given to me in ways that maybe I wouldn't have imagined.

It's about being obedient and disciplined (I'm getting the obedient part more and more but the disciplined part is what I keep kicking and messing up on). If I am disciplined then He can use me to touch others, to motivate and encourage them and to be in the places where He wants me to be at the right times for the particular people. Too often I use the "me" story to not do what is right..."I'm too tired, I need to rest, I just can't today, I'm sore..., it's too much" or my best one "more sleep or focus on myself will make me more aware of life and let me think". What a bowl of bologna!! :)

It's when I'm able to be in God's will and His mindset that things actually happen, growth comes more easily and I am so much more flexible. Trust in God's promises not in your own feelings...

Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday

We're Sectional Champions! That is the high school girls' Varsity basketball team at Jasper. Friday night's game was so close that I think if I could have had a heart attack I would have but this team finds a way to win and I was so impressed with their focus and determination. Last night we played Southridge (one of our county schools) and it went well although I did not celebrate until the last minute when it was totally happening and it was great. It made me remember the feeling I had with my high school team senior year winning tournaments and being cheered on in our sectional against Northwood; as well as the championships during the summer leagues and then especially the National Championships in college.

I screamed so hard that I had to hold my head at one point otherwise it felt like it was going to fall off. Wonderful! Alas, so now we prepare for our Regional. :)

There is much more to say but I am tired. But I will mention that I ran twice this past week (3 miles) each and felt really great!! :)

A Procrastinator

I am a procrastinator -- some weeks are better than others but the message I keep hearing is less is more and that by focusing more on a few things I will end up accomplishing many things...

9 Simple Solutions for Procrastinatorsby Christine Kane
Irony: As I started to write this article, I thought, "I'll just go play one Sudoku game first." I caught myself in the act and marched to my laptop.

People who say that procrastination is about laziness are probably the same people who think that anorexia is about not eating enough. Procrastination isn't about laziness. It's about fear. It's about perfectionism. It's about overwhelm. We all experience it, and there are some tricks to help you get moving again.

Here are 9 ways to break the procrastination habit:
1 - When you get an idea, do some little thing to begin.When I read Stephen King's book On Writing, I noticed something. I noticed that when Stephen King gets an idea, he writes it. Immediately and imperfectly.

Most people get an idea. Then they sit there. They wonder if it's a good idea. Then, they wonder if it's a good idea some more. Got an idea? Begin it now!

2 - All hail small chunks of time!
Lots of us complain about having no time. My guess is that we all have lots of time. It just doesn't happen to be all at once.

Are you waiting for many hours of spare time to begin your idea, your project, or your taxes? Stop waiting! Learn to use the spare half hour that comes up here and there. (I gave myself 45 minutes to write this article just to take my own advice.)

3 - Agree to do it badly.
Set a goal to do it badly. Set a goal to show up. Let go of doing it ALL, or doing it WELL. Some of my coaching clients' biggest victories have a lot more to do with getting over perfectionism and fear, than they do about getting it all done perfectly.

4 - Commit aloud.
Call a friend and say something like this: "I'm going to spend the next half hour working on my Law School Essay." Then go do it. Call the friend after the half hour and make her congratulate you. Repeat daily.

5 - Define quantities.
Nebulous goals make for nebulous results. "I'm gonna get my office organized" is a lot like saying, "We oughtta do something about Global Warming." Most procrastinators have a hard time defining quantities. We think everything needs to be done NOW.When are you going to do it? For how long? Which part of your office? The file cabinet? Or your desk?

Define the goal and acknowledge its completion.

6 - Install this System Upgrade into your Mental Hard Drive: Less is More. Have fewer goals. Have no more than three priorities for a week.
Why?
Because you're not lazy. You're just trying to do too much.
Find out what it feels like to accomplish one thing instead of not quite getting to everything. Wow - what a difference this makes!

7 - Do it first.
My first coach made me write songs first thing in the morning. He told me to schedule the 2-hour chunk as my first activity upon waking.
Why?
"Because you're telling the universe that this is your priority. And then the universe lines up everything to align with your priority." [For a Christian this might be having your quiet time with God.]
Action grounds your priorities. It makes them real. It also makes your day easier because you're not wasting energy thinking about this thing you're supposed to be doing.

8 - Avoid nose-bleed activities.
Email, voicemail, web stats - any activity that bleeds itself into your whole day becomes a non-activity. It becomes a nose-bleed.
When you do it all the time, you never complete it. You just let it slowly drain the very life force from you. Define times for these activities. Then, turn off your email, your cell phone, your web stats, until that time comes.

9 - Don't ask how you "feel" about doing the activity. Have you ever committed to getting fit? And then when the alarm goes off, you lie in bed thinking, "Do I really feel like going to the gym?" (Like you even have to ask!)
Change this pattern. Make your decision the night before. Commit to getting up and going right to the gym, the computer, the blank canvas. Don't have coffee and sigh and think, "I'll probably feel more like it at lunch time." You won't! If it's a priority, don't waste time asking yourself how you feel about doing it. Feelings are an easy out.
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So in this case, what do I desire to prioritize:
* fitness & health
* writing or crafting (at some point)
* preparation for LMFT exam {licensure exam}

Monday, Monday

Maybe it is just a Monday. Monday is a hard day for me...maybe because it is the day with the least structure for me. I'm overwhelmed with choices and on any other day I get excited to think about all I could accomplish or do if I only had that Monday back (including rest). Alas, only one day out of the week can be Monday and it is hard. As much as I don't want to admit it - I do better in routine...though it drives me crazy since I'm such a floater. I love spontaneity and freedom (hmmmm I sound like a toddler)...but I know I need routine. I'm unable to have the gumption to really strive on a Monday.

I think I need to chart my days and see the patterns that occur because I'm sure that they are there and definitely need to be changed. There were great things about today and proactive things; such as, Ian learned how to blow kisses at Ambra's and then demonstrated with me on the way home. :) Unfortunately he may have a sinus infection or is getting pink eye :S. The basketball sectional meal was very nice and enjoyable and Ian had a good day all in all; plus, a group was cancelled due to potential weather (which mind you has not come yet). I hate cancelling something but it seemed like the best alternative since my leaders were either sick or apprehensive about the weather.

I'm trying to think of things to look forward to but it is harder to do so...seeing that every month we're just getting by and putting anything away for a vacation is really non-existent though I feel blessed that I was able to do the "what not to wear" thing. I look forward to Ian growing (he can reach the bar table now!!), de-cluttering the house (a never-ending endeavor), mainly spending time with friends and catching up and see my lady wildcats win sectional and play at regionals in our home gym.

It's amazing how someone with so much faith in God, and faith in other people can have such a lack of faith in herself and in her very own abilities. I guess that keeps me humble but it also depresses me at times. Sometimes it is frustrating just to think about all that is in my head and I really shouldn't...it just confuses me. Thank you that Monday is almost over...and I can start over again on Tuesday. Hello Tuesday.

Creating a New Story about Myself

There is so much to write about, so much to discover, be curious about and learn and so much to simply get through each day in this life. I was reminded while at CCJ (www.ccjasper.com) today about asking myself good questions - those hard questions that at times are difficult to answer. "Whose applause are you living for?" "What are you disappointed with?" "What do you worry about?" Ultimately if we're not focused on God - we make our own idols.

Sometimes I'm very creative and think about life out of the box. It is much more than cause and effect, or consequence and blessing. Our words mean something...what we do means something...
I'm thinking more along the lines of how each of our actions affects someone else whether we realize it or not. We might inspire or deter someone to make a decision simply by our own growth. Example: if I begin growing and working to become more healthy in my daily life inevitably this will also move onto someone else and they might think differently. A friend once told me - give me any choice for a place to eat and that is fine but I will always choose the healthy one. Wow - really? Every time she will choose the healthy one? That was powerful to me because it was a definite. So I started thinking - how would my life change if I had a definite like that or if I practice a definite choice like that? Slowly I've begun to and it has made a difference.
Each time I see a new client and what they are going through it effects me in some way or comes back in my mind later on. I constantly have to work on boundaries because it is so easy to be sucked into another person's life and their worries, troubles and stories. I have to reaffirm and tell myself who I am, who I desire to be and where I'm going just because I'm human.

As you can tell I just feel like writing and writing and writing. Sorting through my thoughts, knowing there is some simplicity in there somewhere.
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Automatic writing. I sometimes use this when I have a lot on my mind. I find a lot of release in simply writing all the thoughts, memories, emotions down. To write without considering grammar or spelling, using any font that speaks to me in the moment – perhaps a script font. I then incorporate the writing into my page, not as journaling per se, but as a decorative element - part of the background. The writing doesn’t have to eligible, only you need to know what you wrote and why. The writing process itself is supposed to be the therapy part, not necessarily being able to read it again at a later point.

Initial Thoughts on "What Not to Wear" Day

Today was the big day I was sort of dreading but excited about...my friend was going with me to Louisville to pick out and try on a new wardrobe (at least the start of one for me).
We kind of had a time-crunch since I had to meet with some other people while there but in the mean time - she picked out all the clothes (off the clearance racks at KOHL'S) while I stared into space and walked the little cart around - all-the-while piling on more and more clothes (it almost tipped over at one point). Occasionally I would look up and say "woah, no way" but otherwise I was willing to try most everything. I kept thinking Stacy or Clinton from "What Not to Wear" on TLC was about to jump out of the racks at me when I did venture off and look at what I thought were "cool" clothes or potentials.

Luckily I did somewhat know my size from previous shopping trips though I never would have picked out even 1/2 or a 1/3 of what she picked out! Purples, greens to name a few. But as I tried on each top and different pair of pants - it was actually fun and a little exciting. This was a first for me.

After two and half hours we exited the store with I think...4 dress pants, and maybe 6 tops? (I'll have to recheck) plus like $150 in savings and then after my meeting ended up at Sears to take home 3 pairs of shoes that automatically fit!! Only one pair of heals mind you and they weren't too bad.

So all in all with discounts, clearance, a gift card and perseverance I now might look like what I know (does that make sense?) -- a professional and with some sort of style. :) Next comes some jewelry which is a hard one for me. I don't know if I can spend some money on "charms" or necklaces.

After that, the hair cut (possible highlights [the first in my life]) and later a more toned body. So it's a start - I'll post a couple of pictures of the venture.

How to Create a Powerful Morning Ritual

It is said that your habits create your destiny. I'd add that your habits also create your confidence, courage and even your creativity! In other words, your daily choices, routines, and seemingly insignificant moments make all the difference in your results.

One of the best ways to generate great results is to create a morning ritual. A powerful morning ritual sets the tone for your entire day - and your entire year! A ritual is personal. A ritual is creative. (Not reactive!) A ritual is what gets YOU on track to create your best day. (And subsequently, your best life!) It can be as simple as a 15-minute routine, or as intense as long-distance running. The important thing is that it becomes a HABIT.

My morning ritual combines a mixture of physical, mental and heart-centered activities to engage each of these human power centers! Here are some ideas to help you create your own powerful morning ritual.

Hydrate First
Many Eastern health practitioners recommend chugging down at least a half-liter of filtered room-temperature water first thing. (Yes, before your coffee!)
Upon waking, your body has spent hours without hydration. Drinking pure water at this time triggers a series of physiological functions that keep your body super healthy. Some report that this one practice can actually heal many diseases. (I'm not a scientist – but I can attest to the amazing results!)

Get Moving
Exercise is called "The Number One Form of Preventive Medicine." It is also a prescription for happiness and a cure for depression! Getting exercise first thing sets your day off right. You can do a simple stretching routine, yoga or an all-out heart-pounding hour at the gym. Pick something do-able and do it.

Meditate [Prayer]
Many people don't meditate because they find it intimidating. I say, start with just 5 minutes. Meditation [prayer] connects you to [God], and to the deep silence that surpasses any drama that might be happening in the world of your personality. Don't worry about doing it right. Just allow yourself the time to BE.

Set Intention
It's true! Your intention is a powerful force to engage. Remembering your intention puts you back on track. You become focused again. Reflect for a moment on your Word of the Year. Read a goal you've written down for yourself. Remind yourself of a financial dream. You don't have to know the HOW. You just need to set the intention so your inner GPS can stay on target!

Be Grateful
Before I get out of bed, I silently create a morning gratitude list. When I begin my day remembering my "gratitudes," (instead of my "anxieties") my heart fills with extreme joy and deep awareness. I then bring that energy into everything I do - and to everyone with whom I connect.

Eat Creative
Your choice of breakfast foods can set up your success with other meals as well. Start your day off in the healthiest way possible for you - and make it a ritual, not a chore.

Be Prepared: Create a Not-to-Do List
Everyone needs a "Not To Do" morning list. Suggestions here include anything that brings up a "reactive" state: Turning on the local news. Checking email. Answering texts. Answering the phone. Let these things wait until AFTER your ritual has been completed!

Your Assignment:
After reading this article, don't just think, "Wow. Those are some good ideas. I should try one or two." Instead, deliberately create your morning ritual now. Take about 20 minutes to think about and write down what your ritual will be each morning. Start simple at first. Choose one or two items from this menu. Or come up with your own. Write out your Ritual in detail. Begin first thing tomorrow morning, and let your habits create YOUR destiny starting now!
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Performer, songwriter, and creativity consultant Christine Kane publishes her 'LiveCreative' weekly ezine with more than 11,000 subscribers. If you want to be the artist of your life and create authentic and lasting success, you can sign up for a FREE subscription to LiveCreative at www.christinekane.com.
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Just thinking about what to change in my morning routine to make it more meaningful and something that I will stick with that will bless myself and others instead of sleeping!!
For me tomorrow morning will be: Hydrate First & Get Moving
Then I will implement two more into Saturday and will see what happens.