Processing Sacred in the Ordinary Moments

Consider your everyday, ordinary life. Consider Buechner’s message: “Listen to your life. See it for the fathomless mystery it is. In the boredom and pain of it, no less than in the excitement and gladness: touch, taste, smell your way to the holy and hidden heart of it, because in the last analysis all moments are key moments, and life itself is grace.” 

• How can you listen to your life? How DO you listen to your life? Stopping, pausing, pacing my mind to consider what is in this very moment. I currently listen through quiet moments. Early morning standing for a brief moment in the drive way before I go in and get ready for my day after my run or workout class. I listen through my commute to work sometimes in silence and sometimes with K-LOVE or AIR1. I stare at my boys while they begin to go to sleep and remember those early days or no sleep but lots of love-this also includes some of the struggles I had during those times too.
• What do you hear? What do you want to hear? I hear clocks often, birds, tasks being done by neighbors when I'm home, I hear air circulating in the hospital and overhead announcements, I hear babies crying and sometimes complete silence except for monitors while in the NICU. I hear life all around me and sometimes I also hear death which ironically feels very deafening and intense at times...but later blends into peace. I WANT to hear encouragement, I WANT to hear building up of others, I want to hear my own thoughts building me up and pressing me forward. I WANT to hear ocean sounds, water, the birds, natural sounds from our earth. I want to hear His spirit in my thoughts expressing to me which way to go or how to think.
• What do you already notice, and what do you want to see more of? I notice that the more hurried I am, the less observant I am. The more sacred I consider my time, the more meaningful my conversations become and I am gentler with myself and others. I want to see more understanding. I want to see more outdoors. I want to see more support.
• How can you begin to dive deeper into noticing the sacred in your ordinary? Perhaps you’re quite good at noticing the details and recognizing them as sacred. How can you develop this practice further? Are there patterns to what you’re noticing? Are you noticing them at a specific time of need, of joy, of tenderness? De-cluttering to allow more space for movement and more space for less distractions. Intentionally focusing on one thing at a time rather than multitasking with 7 things. It is most difficult for me to notice the sacred when I am stressed. I go tunnel-vision and struggle to recalibrate. I am noticing that it is all within my perspective and that my perspective can shift.
• How do you feel in those moments of noticing? I feel more at peace and content when I notice. I realize the importance of pausing or sitting a little longer in the moment. I don't jump to the next thing and just 'am'.
• When you scan your ordinary life, what objects, numbers, signs do you seem to notice? I mostly notice butterflies, wings, owls, occasionally the number 7 but I'm not completely buying into it meaning something every-single-time, when I see turquoise I get very excited!
• What do you think your angles are trying to communicate with you? Are they messages of hope? Confirmation that you are on the right path? That you are loved? That they are simply with you? I am not sure and I have not fully explored this concept. I desire to sift through this subject more from a Biblical point of view to dissect if this is something I believe. I have always considered it to be the Holy Spirit within me (God's Spirit) but I do know that angels exist. I'm just not sure what role they would have in communicating with me.
If there was an angel of Finding the Sacred in the Ordinary and she was trying to tell you one deeply important message, what would it be? If I have this type of angel who is with me then I would surmise she would be telling me to "cherish your quiet moments and simply listen, realize 'you are enough' and loved.
Hello Intention!

Play = discovery

Choosing Joy

I am a Renegade

ren·e·gade

ˈrenəˌɡād/

 noun

1. 1. an individual who rejects conventional behavior

   
   

   
   

I no longer want to conform to the 'American Dream' and the haste and hurriedness that this culture proclaims as successful and beneficial. I see only unfulfilled hearts that long for space to think and to experience. I no longer want to feel like my principles and what I believe in is "untolerable" and that I'm a bigot because I believe something different than someone else. I no longer feel bound to believe that I am suppose to look like the magazine covers and if I don't, that I have somehow failed. I no longer want to sit in silence working to love the unlovable while inconsiderate loud-mouth people (who like their comfort zones) bash another's life because someone is at a different place or season in life than they are--or that their struggles are soley by choice with intention. I no longer want to believe that the education I received is the ONLY avenue for change.

I believe that ordinary, regular people can impact others for the good. I believe that a smile is worth much more than a stare or a whisper. I believe that I am no better than another person. I believe that others' struggles may be more than they can handle and that I need to give grace and love. I believe that God made my body as it is and that I am responsible to care for it and put into it what is needed AND NOT what is always wanted. I believe that my education is helpful and that my experience in life is of even more value. I believe that we are all to thrive and not just to survive. I believe that we will all be held accountable for our motives and actions in this life. I believe that although I don't like the selection for this year's presidential election, that I am to pray for my leaders and hold them accountable to what they say they will or will not do. I believe that pessimism and cynicsm are toxic to one's health but that sarcasm can be healthy and fun if not directed at someone. Lastly, I believe that I am not alone and that others feel this way too but simply may not say anything because of others' perceptions. 

I have many friends from many different backgrounds who have views that I wholey disagree with; however, if you need a meal, a prayer, help of some sort I am willing to be present. Our differences do NOT have to be at the center of our relationships. Love and grace are to be...it's that simple. We can dialogue about it and be respectful.

Transition :: Change, it's what's for Dinner

IT'S BEEN 8 WEEKS! –I transitioned to part-time about 8 weeks ago and it's been very good, HARD, yet very good. Any change in life is hard and full of uncertainties and I'm still navigating these uncertainties. But the even little-bit-more space in my head to create and think about doing something other than exercise, work, food, wash, homework, bed-time AND repeat has been very healthy. God has shown me weaknesses I've known that I have had but haven't had to exactly face yet and now He has me ready to face them. He has me ready to move forward and to trust and to BELIEVE that He is good and HE IS ABLE.  –It's no secret that I struggle with depression and this past year's burn-out moved me deceptively into a functional-yet-paralyzing depression; whereby, it was hard to concentrate, focus on one thing at a time, my thoughts raced, my anxiety over the littlest things was hightened and my overall sense of well-being was depleted. I LOVE what I get to do at the hospital (Perinatal ICU & Neonatal ICU Social Worker) and the sacred moments I encounter daily; however, I was no longer able to give of myself to my loved ones outside of work. I still believe that this work is what I am called to do BUT I know there is so much MORE He has in store for me. I know that painting is suppose to blossom into helping others and guiding them through hard times. I know that running and fitness in my life is to take on a life of its own to help others to move forward. I know that this life is NOT my own. –I am learning that what I am learning right now is preparing me for next steps and I need to share this. MY MESS IS MY MESSAGE. I struggle like everyone else does; yet I want to strive and overcome and trust and persevere. Darkness has a purpose in my life and His light is suppose to come out of it and not for my glory but for God's. I wish so many of my friends could understand this but they continue to chase meaningless things. I don't want to chase meaningless things. A LITTLE OF WHAT’S HAPPENING... –So many springtime colors around here!! Birds hatching and their mothers feeding them in their nests, in our yard! –Enjoying the sunshine - I don't ever want to take that for granted. –Beginning the process of dreaming about Redecorating and repurposing and re-falling-in-love with my home... –The boys are growing, growing, growing. My patience has increased with not being so rushed all the time. And I'm slower to anger (check with me tomorrow to see if this still stands *wink*). –Being able to do more things so that Mark doesn't have to carry almost the entire load like he was before. Watching him begin to pursue some new things for himself –Pursuing self-development again and recalibrating goals –ABOUT TO JUMP OFF THE ADOPTION CLIFF!!!! Ah our electronic Profile is ready, we have Profile books sent to the Adoption Agency to submit to birthmothers when we choose AND this is crazy talk people!!