Once Stacy and I split I found myself running the next 2-3 miles at 8:30-9:00 minute pace which is fast and too fast for the middle of a long training run; thus knee pain hit me like a brick wall around miles 14-15. It was painful so I slowed down and then realized that this knee pain may also be connected to how I allow oxygen to come into my body (a.k.a. talking outloud might help). But more importantly I felt God saying..."turn the music off and talk to me about what is on your mind." I had noticed that when running with Stacy and talking that my knee pain doesn't show up and more importantly the time went by faster so I decided to try it and ended up praying outloud with my Lord for the rest of the run (over an hour and half).
And no this photo is not me. It is to symbolize what it was like running alone, just the sound of my feet on the pavement and my heart in a conversation with God.
It was the most calming thing I think I have ever done running. I had to slow down and I had to face some of my thoughts while more importantly praising Him and praying for others. I also ended up going a slightly different route to add on miles and found myself completely by myself in the middle of not much. God was calling me to Him and I finally got it. I prayed for Mark in more ways than I have before and found peace knowing that by the end of this run, God knew my fears in a way that I had not expressed before, He knew my joys and hopes for Mark and He & I knew where I stand with Ian and motherhood.
The conversation defined a lot for me and at one point I just stopped talking and started listening. Of course my mind kept wanting to tell me TALK so your knee won't hurt but I went in and out and listened. The song, "Thy Word is a lamp unto my feet and a light unto my path" kept going through my mind. I even sang at one point -- RUNNING!
Moral of this story...stop and take time to listen and to speak outloud to God even when you are moving. It made all the difference and wouldn't you know...my knee pain went away almost instantaneously! I laughed, God you're so funny.
The conversation brought new meaning to running and to putting Christ first. What a revelation to me.
Amen Kara, I don't have the words right now but you took them right out of my mouth! I am finding out that i have to do the same thing- no not running and talking, but talking to God while I am in the midst of many things... I know what you are talking about and I wonder why you have these revelations and it took me until I was 61 to realize it and you are only 30! Guess you could say I'm slow! Ha! Anyway, I'm glad you are sharing and that I am benefiting as well! Praise God for your witness! I love you!
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